Good Denial

I can’t lie…

Delay for me (as a Type A personality) is veryyyyy frustrating.  Sometimes the slightest change in what is supposed to be can get me all frazzled. If I’m supposed to be at a certain place, at a certain time and anything alters that, especially something that could be controlled, I am unnerved!

I know…that’s not always good.

But, over time, I’ve learned that delay is not always bad.  In most cases, you even get to where you need to be, right…on…time! I’ve even seen where delay causes a good domino effect…you know, when the first thing is altered, but then your destination actually waits for you to get there?  I believe those particular times are God’s way of showing He’s in control and I don’t have to worry about a change in plans!

I had to make this request: “Lord, help me to not be upset about change, dressed up as delay.”

So…here’s the story.

I scheduled an Uber a few weeks ago to go to the airport because I had a work trip.  Well, what do you know, my Uber driver was a tad bit late.  But surprisingly, I didn’t trip because timewise, I was still good since I’d checked in for my flight through my app and I wasn’t checking a bag.  However, as we get on the interstate and head towards the airport, all of a sudden we see traffic starting to slow down.

“Uh oh”…I thought. “Here we go…”

Thankfully, my driver decided that he would get off the next exit and just take an alternate route.  This sounded like a good idea to me because he stayed calm and had a plan.  I was perfectly fine with that!  As we approached where the traffic began to completely stop, he was getting over in the far-right lane to take the exit, but then we noticed something. What was beginning to stop traffic was the result of a really bad multi-car accident. I mean…each car involved had broken windows and the entire vehicle covered with airbags.  But as we approached the scene, they were still trying to let some traffic pass through before ambulance and other authorities arrived. 

When my driver saw this, he said, “Oh…I don’t have to get off of this exit to detour.  I can take the regular route now and get you to the airport on time!”

My response? “Perfect! Thank You Jesusss!”

And because of this, all was now right in my world.  I was going to make it on time! I could breathe…I could relax…I was going to make it! But then I had the most simple, yet powerful thought:

My driver’s tardiness delayed us from getting to that very spot on the interstate where the accident occurred. That multi-car wreck could have easily involved us had we arrived by the exit, a moment sooner…a moment…sooner.

There’s a saying that goes: “Delayed, but not denied.”

I’ve changed that now.

Delay in my opinion? Is denial.

Delay is protection.

Delay can actually be… good.

Sounds crazy right? Let me explain.

Denial of something isn’t always bad. In our culture denial has a negative connotation because to be denied of something doesn’t feel good. Take for instance, when you deny yourself of your favorite foods for the sake of losing weight. It is really hard to look at other people eat cupcakes or brownies and you eat fruit or trail mix…lol! 

But ultimately, that denial could be your protection from certain diseases, ailments, that don’t necessarily show up until later in life.  Nowwwww do you see what I mean about “good denial”?  I’ll go even further. Have you ever seen how some people’s choices early in life manifested in their later life?  I certainly have.

Sometimes...delay can simply deny you of a physical, emotional, and mental breakdown.

Sometimes...delay can deny you of stress.

Sometimes...delay can deny you of being at the wrong place at the wrong time.

Sometimes...delay can deny you of associating with people who just aren’t good for your life.

Sometimes...delay can deny you of living a hard or rough life.

Sometimes...delay can deny you of making difficult decisions prematurely.

Sometimes...delay can save…your…life.

This is why I say delay, is protection.  Protection from what was meant to destroy you!

Some people have decided that in a lot of areas of my life, I’m delayed.  I understand now that all these years, I’ve been protected. 

Mmmmmm….hmmmmmmmmmm…

Protection from so many unnecessary scenarios that I’ve seen play out for others. And for that alone, I’m GRATEFUL.

Now realizing that I’ve been protected, means nothing but freedom for ME.  It puts me in a position to look at my life through the correct lenses and because of that, I won’t let anyone else make me see differently.

The things I have experienced have put in a place of gratefulness, humility, and patience.  I’m not anxious about things…whether they happen or not…whether someone will do this or that…

Delay in my life has taught me the lesson of trusting in the One who controls the times and the seasons. If He doesn’t do it, it just doesn’t need to be done.  If He doesn’t allow to happen, it shouldn’t.

That’s it. That’s all.

I’m okay with not being pushy or trying to control what’s never been in my control!

What is it that you felt “denied” of in your life?  If you think about it, was the denial for a short time? Did you ever receive what you expected from it? Maybe in a different form? Or did what you envisioned happen later and just not in your timing?

I encourage you to look at denial differently…

And even when your denial looked like the ultimate disappointment, that was all purpose too, you know.

I want to leave you with one of the best things that could’ve been said:

“I am God.  At the right time, I’ll make it happen.” (Isaiah 60:22-MSG)

Just wait…appreciate His timing and look at it, as good…denial:)